Provider, Father, Husband, Myself... Any of us who started a family, hoping this thing inside would go away only to find at some point you can't push it away any longer finds theirselves in a horrible place. All my life I knew deep down who and what I was inside. No matter how hard I try. She slips out little by little. I created a wonderful life. Good job, Beautiful wife, Kids, Now in my mid 30's, I feel stuck. Do I throw it all away to be true to myself? Or do I be misurable to only be happy When i can sneek off into my secret world? I don't want this to be a secret anymore. I long to be out. but that means I will probobly loose most of my friends who know me as a man. it puts a horrible strain on my marrige for her to keep this secret. She can't see the person who has loved her for so many years anymore. Only the woman inside. I have no family who would accept me as Annette. i worry about my kids going to school and being teased about their sissy father. i am a woman. no matter how I appear on the outside. So I go on day by day trying to play multiple roles. Anyone out there who is in that begining part of their lives before marrige. think twice. Don't put her through this hell our situation creates. find yourself first. Be open and upfront about who you are. Let her make her own choice wether or not to go down this road with you. you may find as I have, your sexuality is in a state of flux. Decide who you should be first. Don't force yourself to play multiple roles.