Near the end of 2010, I suffered a loss. 2 weeks before Christmas, I got a call from mom's nurse who was standing outside her home. Mom was not answering the phone or coming to the door. Her home health aide was also there. Being an hour away, I told the nurse to do what was best and I immediately headed home. On the way the nurse called me and gave me the bad news. Mom was found in her bed under her afghan. She died in her sleep. I arrived to find the funeral directors waiting for me, and giving me my privacy with mom. As I looked at her, I was filled with solace and thankfulness that she got her wish and passed away the way she desired and prayed for.
The funeral was simple and what she would have wanted. How many times did I hear mom's request before I left for home after checking on her..."Now when I die remember what I ask for..."
My brother and I were her caregivers with assistance of the elder care agency, next door cousins and a lovely neighbor across the street. As caregivers bro and I would travel on alternating weekends to take care of her needs. With help from my wife, I supplied her meals for each day, helped her with finances, bills and supplies, while my brother did the maintenance. Now she is with Dad in God's Hands.
But I am also aware that her death is like releasing another lock on the transgender closet door. This year is looking to be one of revelation. I don't have to worry about revealing this to mom. The mantra is to be patient. I am on the right path and hope to tell you all more throughout the year.