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"We are One"


This image is making the rounds of Facebook right now.  It is rather poignant and says quite a bit about our tendency to apply unnecessary labels to ourselves and others.  It touched enough of a nerve with me that I shared it on my wall.  Something I try to be judicious about.


We often talk about the perfect world in which we are all just seen as people without regard to our race, creed, gender, sexual orientation or preference for chocolate.

That would be a wonderful world.

Or would it?

Imagine a label-less world.  One in which everyone we encountered was seen in the same light.  No differentiation from one person to the next.  A universe of perfect equality.  A perfect nirvana.

The most boring, inefficient and useless place in human history.

Remember back to grade school social studies.  When we learned about early civilisations, we talked about the necessary conditions for societies to advance.  One of those characteristics that marked the groups who progressed was the ability to specialise and develop a division of labour.   Humans moved forward when they learned to recognise, embrace and take advantage of their differences.

Labels are a necessary part of our life.  Without labels, we would never know who was who, or who did what.  As an advanced society, we have to be able to identify the specialists.   Thursday afternoon I sat with a friend and helped her fill out an application for a practice learning placement connected to her social work course.  The most significant part of the application was the section that asked her to describe herself.

She is a humble person and needed a bit of a nudge to get her started with the list of her virtues.  By the time she was done, she had produced very impressive description of herself.  The only way she could do that was to use labels for herself.  The descriptive terms, communicator, helper, and facilitator, all complimentary, are still labels.  She could not have described herself without the use of labels.

The problem, and why this is even worthy of discussion here, is that we have an issue, not with labels, but with how we use them.  Similar to police profiling, we take a valuable tool and through our own laziness turn it into a weapon for harm.  We often look for the simple solutions to our complex problems.  We identify the negative and begin to follow the causal chain.  When we get to the first negative cause we stop and by changing that we assume we have solved the problem.   Usually all that does is create bigger problems.

I follow another blog written by a woman with medical and anxiety issues.  She recently wrote about how people look at her judgmentally because she is so thin yet eats salads ( http://artfulanxiety.wordpress.com/2012/09/23/leave-your-judgement-... ).  They should try to live her life for a minute, or at least get to know her before they pass judgement.

The same goes for any label.  I am a person first, but the rest of the items in that list shouldn’t necessarily be crossed out.  I am transgender.  The jury is still out on the gay/straight/bi thing.  I am also white, of European descent, an atheist, and so many other things that you really have to get to know me in order to understand how they all fit together.

Wait a minute!  Is she on to something here?  Get to know her?

Maybe, just maybe, if we accept that we are all different in many ways and the same in many others, and if we realise that even those to whom any one label may apply demonstrate a variety of characteristics under that label, we can use labels to our advantage.  We can use them as a basis for ( and I know this is challenging for many, because it takes effort ) actually getting to know a person before we form opinions about them.

Nobody likes to start a conversation with a stranger blindly.  We all need at least a small item from which to begin (unless, of course, we only want to talk about our favourite subject, ourselves).  Labels give us a place to start.  They are not a place to finish.

I do realise that what I am proposing here could lead to a chaotic upheaval of our very social fabric.  We could possibly end up with a world where people take the time to get to know and understand each other for real.  A world where Salafist extremists couldn’t rile up whole mobs based on a mostly ignored YouTube film made by a nutter who was trying to start trouble.  A world where people wouldn’t blame a religion that is adhered to by 23% of the world’s population for the actions of  .0007% ( that’s seven ten thousandths of a percent or 7 millionths of the whole group for those of you less inclined toward maths ) of its members.

This could lead to such silly things and peace and understanding.  There could be justice.  Heaven forbid, but this could lead to enlightenment and tolerance.  We could stop letting the wealthy minority that controls the media tell us how to think, and we could think for ourselves.  We could find out that just because we disagree with one part of a person’s life, there are other things about them we can embrace.  We could make new friends.

There must be a catch.  This is too easy.  All I’m proposing is that we use that thing between our ears for something other that memorizing this year’s Idol and X-Factor contestants.  That we take a little time to read, and talk, and learn.  I just want us to exert a little effort.

Oh!  There it is.  The “e” word.  Poop!  I knew it was too easy.  People would have to want to improve their relationships with others enough to exert some effort.  Maybe after they watch 16 and Pregnant?

Who knows?  A girl can hope.

Views: 99

Comment by Caroline Grace on September 26, 2012 at 5:06am

Labels can be harmful if we stop seeing people and only see the label. We totally agree on that and I like the fact that you are trying to nudge your readers to a better place. As we can all use some nudging from time to time, you have done us a favor,

People see the world through the lenses they put on each morning. If we put on ones that can filter out the positive things we will only see the negative things. If we use a positive filter, we will miss the negative things. But we do have a choice as to which filter to use and when to use it.

In a meeting of social workers talking about problems faced by LGBT seniors by non-accepting staff delivering services, one described being transgender "as the cherry on the cake." My reaction was to stand up and say, "I am transgender,"  I needed to switch the conversation from "those people" to "we" by letting them know that LGBT people were among them...

My reaction to the poster in your blog? Mixed, and somewhat disappointed. This is not my first reaction as I have seen this before. When I first saw it, I was thrilled to think about the prompting to look at the person and not just the label. Now that I have had more time to digest it, I believe we should be proud of who we are even when we are different than mainstream folks.  The crossed out words are clues to what we have been through and who are are, though I know that they are not definitions of our souls or our character. I believe we should not have to hide who we are to get a fair judgement from others, so I live openly.  And if I am the only TG person another knows and they judge the whole community be me - which I do know happens - I always do us proud by behaving in a manner that brings us credit. So hang a label on me, because those who will matter most to me won't stop when seeing it... and I just might nudge along someone who might have stopped at that label in the past.

 

 

Comment by Janell Elynn Smith on September 28, 2012 at 6:20pm

The only label that is important to me and I value is that "I am a Spiritual Being" and "I am having a physical experience."  I was born into this world from the Spiritual World  and when this life is complete I will return from where I came. I have a purpose in this life and when I have fulfilled that purpose I will once again return to that which I came from.----Blessings, Elynn

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