PINKessence

"We are One"

How do I even start?

Suddenly single after a 20 year relationship/marriage, like everybody else I've gone through many stages - Hurt, depression, denial etc. 

Ive been told all my I should have been a girl, from a picture of me in a christening dress to ex wives/girlfriends commenting on my personality. I even dressed at the insistence of a roommates girlfriend one Halloween (what fun I had). I even had a boss who took me aside and told me i'd make a great looking woman.

Oh sure i tried on the occasional pair of panties but i had to much fun with guy things - Hunting, Fast cars, football, Drinking beer and much much more.

But fate works in funny ways, one day while on a walk something pink on the side of the road caught my eye, a pair of pink thongs (actually two) i whisked them into my pocket and headed home. After washing them i tried them on, size 6 fit like a glove and so it started for real. 

Now i knew my pantie size so i bought a pack of hanes nylon high cuts a Kmart. With newfound confidence i bought more, bras, makeup at Sally dresses at a resale shop (under the pretense of going girl for Halloween. 

So I'm in the process of developing Penni, Look, voice, mannerisms, etc.

Stay tuned....

Views: 71

Comment by Caroline Grace on September 11, 2012 at 4:45am

Welcome to a place filled with people who understand that gender and sex are two diiferent things. 

Comment by Jenn on September 11, 2012 at 1:07pm

Hi Penni.  

Most, if not every one of us, struggles with the question, "who am I?"  You may have just figured it out.   A clue is the love of pink.  I too find pink a beautiful, vibrant, soothing color.  It's a girl thing.  

None of this would make sense to a guy who just got a thrill wearing panties.  As you've described, the girl inside needs to be completed as a woman.  Exploring and bringing Penni to life successfully as a woman will be the most complex yet rewarding thing you will have ever done with your life.   If you've ever done acting you'll recognize the total emersion you need to make in a new persona.  Penni needs to move with grace and fluidity.  She needs a voice that is liltingly feminine.  Does she love shoes, dresses, adornment?  Is her hair her crowning glory?  When she enters a room does she literally suck the air out of the room with her presence?  You've made a great start with a beautiful smile.  

I know some of us as transgender women want to stay under the radar screen and remain invisible but I want to suggest that if you're going to be a woman, make it worthwhile.  Pick a famous woman as your role model.  You will ultimately become yourself but it speeds the process to follow a role model.  What you're literally doing is what young girls do as they blossom into womanhood only you're going to have to do it in fast forward.  

Hugs, Jennifer

Comment by HELEN BRADY on September 11, 2012 at 3:32pm

You go girl!  In 5 years I have such a massive wardrobe all my closets are full and all flat surfaces are overflowing with clothes......I think I'm a "clothesaholic" but then I think my gg gf is too!.

Comment by Katie Barrett on September 18, 2012 at 9:12pm

Good luck!  It sounds like a time of remarkable change.  Your pictures look great, and I love your sense of style.  More importantly, I hope that you are doing well.

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