"The only time that, that word is okay is when referring to the transmission in a vehicle. Once I came and started working on my transition. I could finally admit that I hate working on cars (though I still know more then most men). So I never use…"
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Sheri Proctor
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Sheri Proctor posted a status"http://ning.it/NosdaR I am curious what everyone else thinks about this ad Good Bad indifferent?"
Sheri Proctor commented on Claire DeLap's blog post LGBT and BDSM"I personally believe that we have too many labels and try and separate ourselves and others way to much... "
Sheri Proctor commented on Sheri Proctor's blog post trans ugliness and umbrella terms"Rachael it is relevant in the us vs them (while I agree that there is and should be a place for us vs them). I'd like to look at this as a huge college or university.... We all go to the same school and thus have a lot in common. However…"
Sheri Proctor commented on Sheri Proctor's blog post trans ugliness and umbrella terms"Rachel and Julia I agree that cross dressers have nothing in common with me..... Nothing except that they are also a marginalized group, as are all in the inclusive alphabet soup community. Yes as Transsexuals or Intersexed there are many things…"
Sheri Proctor commented on Sheri Proctor's blog post trans ugliness and umbrella terms"? I don't understand we use Wordpress for our website...."
Sheri Proctor commented on Michelle Wolf's blog post To Pass or Not to Pass"Thank you that was very written about a subject that concerns all of us... personally if I thought that I could have passed better (and I did then) when I was 17 and ran away from home so that I could transition I would have then. But! I got a hold…"
Sheri Proctor posted a blog posttrans ugliness and umbrella terms
Many of you who know me also know that I spend lots of time on facebook and not enough here on PE. That is for many reasons (and I know that I need to spend more time here because this is where those whom I am the closest with are). This is where I belong.I spend so much time on facebook because that is where my organization can get the most exposure. Which part of the reason for this blog post. If you don't know I am the executive director (or as my staff refers to me as the "Dreamer in…See More
Sheri Proctor commented on Stephanie McKenzie's blog post Dr. Osterhaut - Terrible Experience at Colorado Gold Rush! PLEASE READ AND BOYCOTT!"wow, I nearly went to Dr. Osterhout's workshop... but I went to Kate's on documents (this is a constant issue for as you all know and I have become somewhat of an activist on this issue here in Colorado). So I missed this workshop, up-till…"
Sheri Proctor commented on Chloe Prince's group GOLD RUSH Conference & The GIC"that is great news CiCi.... its been way too long and I can not wait to see you again.
"
Sheri Proctor commented on Holly N Colorado's blog post An observation"I believe that we are in a very unique situation.... we get to see male privilege first hand! Even when it is so subtle
When the feminist's of the world we are the perfect people to fight sexism when and if we speak up. We especially have…"
Profile Information
- I am a:
- Male to Female Transgender Person
- I Express My Gender Variance:
- Full Time (Gender Marker Not Legally Changed)
- My Gender Status is:
- Alternative Pre-op Transsexual (Following my own path towards GRS - Therapy and Hormone treatment may NOT have been followed according to the WPATH standards – I am prepared for GRS and pursuing alternatives toward acquiring it)
- I have undergone or been prescribed:
- Hormones, Laser Hair Removal, Electrolysis
- Relationship Status:
- Divorced (Kids are Grown)
- I am interested in:
- Out Reach, Support Groups, Friends, Dating, Activism, Sharing Photos, Blogging, Vlogging, GNO's, Public Functions, Private Functions
- I am NOT interested in:
- Chatting, Camming, Exchanging Pics, Women, Post-Op Transsexuals, Religious Views
- 100 Words About Me:
- While this might be cheating Susan tells my story in fewer words much better then I ever could.
By Susan Greene
Denver Post Columnist
Posted: 04/14/2009 12:30:00 AM MD
Sheri Proctor counts her Sam's Club card as one of her proudest possessions.
It's not the discounts that make the ID so special. It's the name and photo of the person it represents: Sheri, a woman, rather than Don Proctor, the man she was for 47 years. The man she legally still is.
First, let's deal with the pronouns.
Angie Zapata — the transgender woman whose accused killer faces trial today in Greeley — lived openly as a "she" starting in her mid-teens.
For Proctor, it was more complicated. She felt like a female from earliest memory but struggled decades longer before coming out as a woman.
"It's been a long process from he to she," says the 49-year-old newspaper deliverer from Boulder. "Compared to Angie, the line wasn't always so clear."
Don Proctor was raised among 11 kids in a Mormon family that expected its eldest son to fix cars, defend his sisters and act as man of the house while his dad was in Vietnam.
As a young boy, he would tell himself that if he could kick a rock all the way home from school, he would wake up as a girl the next morning.
"I would dream that buzzards would carry me away and peck at certain parts of my body until it turned inside out," she says.
Don would sneak around in his sisters' bras until he got a paper route and started buying — and hiding — his own. He would soften his voice when speaking, only to be commanded by his father to "put some bass in it, boy."
At age 20, Don Proctor married a woman who months later discovered his makeup, wig and stash of women's clothes in his car. The couple divorced after seven kids and 13 years together. He lived for 14 more years flip-flopping about his identity.
He kept it hidden until he couldn't anymore. The last day he lived fully as a man was in 2007, when he walked one of his daughters down the aisle.
"They still don't want to deal with it," Sheri says of her kids and the six grandchildren who know her as their grandfather.
It's only when visiting them that she still lives in limbo, pulling her hair into a ponytail and donning a sweatshirt to cover up the breasts that years of hormone treatment have produced.
Otherwise, she walks through her days wearing black eyeliner, blue eye shadow and tight, low-cut shirts. Cleavage distracts from her manly traits.
"I hate my voice. I hate my huge man hands. I hate how tall I am," she says. "Boobs, at least, earn me some acceptance."
Sheri identifies as a lesbian but doubts that "any woman would be attracted to me." It's a testament to the pull of living female that she has "pretty much given up sex in the process."
What people don't get, she says, is that hers is not a question of sexual preference but gender identity. What people don't know is how tough it is to fight your biology. And what they can't imagine is how painful it is to be leered at in the market or hatefully called "sir."
"Boulderites aren't nearly as progressive as they think they are," she says.
If it weren't for her kids, Sheri would have regretted waiting so long. If only she had made the change sooner, she says, her skin would be softer, her body shapelier and the illusions easier to pull off.
She envies Zapata for having the strength to come out so young.
"Angie was able to do what I could not do back then," she says of the kid whose alleged killer she plans to watch stand trial, however long it takes.
"But, then again," she adds, "she was killed for it."
Susan Greene writes Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays. Reach her at 303-954-1989
Sheri Proctor's Blog
trans ugliness and umbrella terms
Posted on April 15, 2012 at 11:00am 4 Comments 0 Likes
Many of you who know me also know that I spend lots of time on facebook and not enough here on PE. That is for many reasons (and I know that I need to spend more time here because this is where those whom I am the closest with are). This is where I belong.I spend so much time on facebook because that is where my organization can get the most exposure. Which part of the reason for this blog post. If you don't know I am the executive director (or as my staff refers to me as the "Dreamer in…
Read MoreComment Wall (5 comments)
- At 10:43am on October 30, 2012,
Adeena Dawn Forrester said… Happy Birthday!!! :)
- At 2:52pm on October 30, 2011, Adeena Dawn Forrester said…
Happy Birthday!!!
- At 7:02pm on October 30, 2010,
Juli Hendrix said… - Happy Birthday Sheri!
Here's wishing that your transition goes
well during this solar revolution!
***HUGS***,
Juli
- At 12:29pm on March 2, 2010, Sheri Proctor said…
- Thank you Marsha and Andrea... that column was printed on the day that the monster who murdered Angie Zapata trial started... with all of the publicity surrounding that trial I worked with GLAAD (great advice) and The Center in Denver for this. Our goal was simple education... and to promote Colorado's Hate Crime law to show the need for the Matthew Shepard (who's murder was less a hundred miles from Angie's) Federal hate crimes bill. I had to give Susan the information that she needed for that column (all of her columns are great by the way). I don't think that I could have lived with myself had he gotten off (he did not in fact this was the first time that a hate crime against a transgender victim was successful), Or the Matthew Shepard bill did not pass.
I believe that my role as a transgender woman is to help educate... My parents did a lot of harm in raising (picture a Mormon version of SGT.Carter from Gomer Pyle and you have a very clear picture of my father) myself, my sisters and brothers, however one very good thing that they taught us as we traveled all over the world. Is that we just might be the only American that others ever meet... as such we have set the example and be on our best behavior! This is something that Cloe also preached (she used different words) through out Colorado Gold Rush. We as Transgender people are often the only transgender persons that those around meet or know... we have to set a good example! The only way that we are going to be accepted is to teach everyone about us and set a good example.
- At 8:28am on March 2, 2010,
Marsha M. Marsha said… - Welcome Sheri to PE. Not everyone gets a write up in the paper and has the courage to be an open book to be an encouragement to our community. I hope you will avail yourself of our site and I am glad to have you with us.
Hugs,
Marsha
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