I’ve been in a relationship with the father of my child for about 9 years now. Our relationship has been rocky and unstable, but we’re all living together and determined to make it work. Our first year in Austin has been rough with health problems, but we’re making it.
Another big thing that has happened this year is that he’s come out in saying that he wishes to transform his body to match his woman’s soul. He’s seeing a councelor mainly for this purpose. Luckily he’s getting the counciling he needs here as he’s felt this way most of his life and for many years unsure of what it was.
Although I’m happy for him that he’s found a path to bring him joy, there’s something else that’s going on that I’m not sure has to do with being transgender or is just him. I DO NOT mean to be offensive, insinuating that being transgender makes you dishonest and a cheater. THAT IS NOT MY POINT. I’m writing this while I’m very confused and I know that being transgender is a big point in his life right now.... well I’m sure I’m, going to piss off half that read this, and I’m sorry.
In the first few years of our relationship, we decided to play around with other people sexually. We’re both bisexual (or mostly gay/lesbian except for with each other if that makes any sense?)
I gave up on the sexual escapades not long after mainly because of depression and low self confidence, and he kept on. At the time our relationship was so unstable that I just ignored it the best I could.
This last year we’re interested in making things better. But although I’ve told him that we need to stay faithful to each other, he seems to have little intrest. He finds casual partners on craigslist, once he had someone over in the middle of the night and I walked in. Luckily they hadn’t started yet. I was nosing into his phone for weeks before and found a few times where he’d hooked up with someone. We had another chat (these are hard to do) recently and I point blank asked him if he’d messed around with someone recently and he said he had a few weeks ago. Then that night I nosed again and found out he had less than a week earlier. I’m heartbroken amd devastated.
I don’t know who to go to with these feelings I have now. I guess I just need to talk to strangers who might shed some insight. I’m seeing a councelor and Im interested in couple’s counseling soon. He’s hemhawing about it. I'm so sorry if I make someone mad .
She dresses as a girl, as was when I walked in. But I don't know if it's everytime. She's told me of times it went both ways. I know there will be lots of talks about this and couneling. What you said does make sense. Thanks alot. I'll probly write back more when I digest this and have more questions..
Toriam you did not say anything, that I read, to pissoff anyone. This problem is shared by a lot of couples in the LBGTQS community. One wants to make it work and the other only says they do when they don't. The words are there but the heart is not which shows a selfish trait and only thinks of their own needs. This is what I have found out during my 62 yrs.